February 28, 2013
Is your self-esteem based on always being right? It may be if every error or misjudgment makes you terrible embarrassed or angry. If this is the case, a little attitude alteration may be just what you need to get back on track.
Depending on our attitude, being in the wrong may be seen as a chance to learn~an invitation to wisdom. Everyone makes mistakes. The question isn't whether or not we do, but how we handle it. If we use every mistake as a chance to get down on ourselves, our mistakes can teach us nothing. And every mistake thereafter will not serve as an opportunity to learn, either.
Think how different it would feel to simply acknowledge the error, pull up our socks, and forgive ourselves! Then, in the absence of all that disproportionate emotion, we could learn from the mistake. Perhaps in spite of the momentary embarrassment, we would find it was well worth the tumble.
When I exchange my mistakes for wisdom, I'm making a good trade.
H/T: Believing In Myself
We love Taylor Swift!
We were listening to this song on her RED CD on the way to school this morning. I can't get the song out of my head. And now you won't be able to get the song out of your head! Ha!
February 27, 2013
February 26, 2013
What have I been doing this evening? I've been uncovering tax discrepancies. In one scenario a charitable organization listed us as giving less than what we actually gave. Then they tried to say that our January donation was really a December donation. Uh, no...I purposely stop giving mid December so I don't have to deal with these type of discrepancies. Do I need to just skip January donations and save them for February?
Same thing for my non-employee status for one company. They have me listed as earning less than what I actually made. Uh, no...I'm an honest person. I always tell our tax gal how much I made even if it's slightly more than what the company has me listed as making. Again, I have the proof to back up my numbers. These discrepancies don't belong to us.
What do I do in these scenarios? I contact them through e-mail and then follow-up first thing in the morning with a phone call. As far as waiting for corrected documentation, ha-ha-ha! Uh, I don't wait for corrected documentation. I have everything I need to prove our numbers and I absolutely will not keep our tax lady waiting...no way!
I have a few more papers to gather up and sift through and lots of shredding to do. Normally I keep track of mileage on certain things but since some of these amounts don't normally add up to anything I've decided to skip the mileage.
It's crunch time. I'd like to have everything done and ready to go by Thursday evening. That sounds like a plan Stan! :)
Today she wrote a post titled: Emotionally Unavailable Father; The Message of Passive Abuse. This post really resonated with me. When it comes to emotionally unavailable fathers I can totally relate in more ways than one.
It's like I told Darlene over on Emerging from Broken: Today, my boundaries are STRONG.
I am grateful for people like Paula of Paula's Pontifications and Darlene of Emerging from Broken for having the guts to share your experiences, strengths and hope with the rest of the world. You are doing a wonderful service because I am sure there are many people out there just like me who have at times felt quite alone and it's just great to know that there are people who have taken some very bad things that have happened and turned it around to inspire and provide hope for so many.
What we don't see, we can't understand. What we don't understand, we can't influence. And when that blind spot relates to the source of our self-esteem, the results can be devastating.
Hurt that has been denied, mislabeled, or unrecognized still exists, no matter how long ago we were wounded. In fact, such hurt~that is the hard core of all anger~is all the more potent for not being recognized or for being called something else. The trouble with burying something alive is that it will devour us from the inside. Buried does not necessarily mean dead.
At the core of much low self-esteem is just such a hard knot of anger. Anger over the way we were treated as children, rights that were denied, kindnesses that should have been there for us but were not. Love, encouragement, support, perhaps even the basic safety that everyone has a right to~none of these were to be had. Buried, that collection of hurts turned into anger and seeped out sideways. Sometimes the seeping turns into a flood. Often it becomes simply a prevailing state of being~we are just always angry, always hostile, always operating with a short fuse. That doesn't make us very attractive people. To say the least, we're not fun to be with. And so the anger over our long-ago hurt generates loneliness and rejection even today. Lest our tomorrows be affected as well, let us own up to our buried anger.
Hidden anger can kill me. I must recognize it and address it.
H/T: Believing In Myself
February 25, 2013
This book is fueling my Christian faith like no other book has done. Seriously, if you don't have Bible Doctrine: Essential Teachings of the Christian Faith by Wayne Grudem in your home library..you may want to think about getting it..I promise you that it will totally fuel your faith.
Chapter 23 - Sanctification (Growth in Likeness to Christ) - How do we grow in Christian maturity? What are the blessings of Christian growth?
Chapter 29 - Gifts of the Holy Spirit (I): General Questions - What are spiritual gifts? How many are there? Have some gifts ceased? How do we seek and use spiritual gifts?
Chapter 30 - Gifts of the Holy Spirit (II): Specific Gifts - How should we understand and use specific spiritual gifts?
I also completed this week's homework and next week's homework for women's Bible study. We're studying the book of Hebrews. I love every bit of it. I just can't get enough of the Gospel.
You're probably wondering why I'm trying to get all of my homework done early. Well, it's because I want to be able to kick back a little towards the end of the week. I'm also trying to get all our papers together for our tax appointment. Yep, I'm the accountant in this house. It's up to me to make sure we have all our ducks in a row by the end of the week.
We are taking the kiddos to a concert on Friday. Toby Mac is expected to perform along with some other Christian musicians. My kids probably know all the words to all the songs that are played on K-Love; therefore, they will be jamming out at the concert on Friday.
My birthday is on Saturday. I have no idea what Don has planned for me. I guess I'll have to wait and see. And now you know why I'm trying to get all my homework done early!
It may take great courage to speak up to a browbeater after a long life of passivity.
The point is not whether we are afraid, but whether we do what needs to be done. That's the hero's way.
Any time I defy fear, I perform an act of heroism.
February 24, 2013
"Let me learn to keep peace with silence when it is not the right time to say what comes to mind."
". . . There is a time to keep silence and a time to speak"
When the guilt of the toxic person explodes, I must realize that it is always aimed at those nearest, and often dearest. I want to remind myself that such outbursts only reveal the toxic person's own unhappiness.
We all wish good things to happen to us, but we cannot just pray and then sit down and expect miracles to happen. We must back up our prayers with action. ~Freedom From Despair
February 23, 2013
I will not permit myself to become emotionally involved in matters that should not be my concern. I will not interfere with the working out of another's difficulties, however dear and close we may be to each other. Detachment is essential to any healthy relationship between people. Each of us is a free individual, with neither one in control of the other.
"For what knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shalt save thy husband? Or how knowest thou, O man, whether thou shalt save thy wife? As the Lord hath called every one, so let him walk."
February 22, 2013
February 21, 2013
I Love the class!
We are on week #4 and for homework I am scheduled to read chapters 14, 15, & 16 out of Grudem's book.
Chapter 14 - The Person of Christ - How is Jesus fully God and fully man, yet one person?
Chapter 15 - The Atonement - Was it necessary for Christ to die? What really happened in the atonement? Did Christ descend to hell?
Chapter 16 - Resurrection and Ascension - What was Christ's resurrection body like? What is its significance for us? What happened to Christ when he ascended into heaven?
I should probably get started with the homework assignment if I plan to be finished before class.
Kinsley has had fever on and off since she was sent home from school Tuesday. She took a turn for the worse yesterday but seems to be on track to getting better now that she has her antibiotic as well as the rest of her prescription medication our doctor wanted her to have.
One thing that I noticed through this process is that we need a new thermometer. The one we have is a digital under-the-tongue one and it had a completely different reading as compared to the doc's across-the-forehead and ear thermometers. Does anyone have a thermometer brand or type you'd like to recommend? I'm all ears and in this case eyes since we are communicating via the blog.
I would also like to say that I am getting super tired of pharmacists trying to interfere with the doctor's orders. I don't have time to debate you on your over-the-counter recommendations. One size does not fit all AND last time I checked you are NOT a doctor. Drippy sarcasm will not get you anywhere with me and certainly not when I have a sick kid in the van who needs her medication and her bed at HOME.
(I was going to share the whole story but am so exhausted from all that has happened I just don't have the energy. If you are a pharmacist reading this post I have some advice for you: please stop blaming the hospital, clinics, and doctors. Do your job and stop trying to interfere with the doctor/patient relationship. Take the initiative to pick up the phone and call the doctor/nurse if you need clarification. Don't get into it with Moms who have sick kids. We don't want to hear it!)
Can you imagine what healthcare will become once Obamacare is fully implemented?
We are under a winter snow warning until tomorrow. When this is all over we will have accumulated about 10 inches of snow. The snow hit the metro at about noontime.
I'm glad school was cancelled last night. I don't particularly care for the automated 5 am wakeup call. I'm almost positive school will be cancelled for tomorrow, too.
Mental sobriety is a state of reasonableness, rational judgment, balance. It is emotional sickness when we continue to be apprehensive and anxious when we really have no reason to doubt.
"I will pray today and every day, for healthful, wholesome thinking, so that I may not generate trouble for myself."
Today I can be more tolerant of others views as I learn to take what I like and leave the rest. I don't have to let outside issues distract me from my primary spiritual goal. I'll keep the doors open, for I never know where I might find help.
The pursuit of any treasure requires risk. Little progress will be made if our first concern is to avoid disappointments. In spite of our discouraging past experiences, we need to try again.
February 20, 2013
Yesterday the school nurse called while I was at Bible study to say that Kinsley was in her office sick and with a temperature of 101.0 – Oh no!
(Can I just say that I LOVE the magnet school my kids go to. The nurse really went above and beyond yesterday to help us in our time of need and I will never forget her kindness – ever.)
Kinsley wasn’t sick throwing up. She doesn’t really have a runny nose. She did develop a bit of a cough but today she hasn’t been coughing all that much. She just has a fever.
This morning when I checked her temperature she was 102.6 – The school policy is that your child must be fever-free for 24 hours before they can return to school.
(You know, I wish more parents would adopt that same policy. We might not have as many sick kids if we were all on the same sick page. I know, I know, wishful thinking on my part.)
So…since Kinsley had 102.6 this morning…that means we can’t really send her back to school tomorrow. Tomorrow is class picture day! We’re due to get 10 inches of snow tomorrow; so, I’m hoping school will be called off for tomorrow. I’ve got my fingers crossed.
So far we’ve been alternating Kinsley between Advil and Tylenol. Her ears don’t hurt so we don’t believe she has an ear infection. Her throat doesn’t hurt and it doesn’t look swollen. We decided if she still has a fever at lunch time I will call the doc and get her in before this snow storm hits. Maybe the doctor will be able to help us figure out this mystery fever.
Right now Kinsley’s job is to relax, drink plenty of fluids, and take it easy. We set up our travel DVD player in her room and she is kicking back with some of her favorite movies. She doesn’t sound all that great so I have a feeling we’ll be headed to see the doctor soon.
None of us have experienced the flu this year or strep. (Knock-on-wood) I’d like to keep it that way but do hope Kinsley will make a comeback here soon. I don’t like it when my sweet kiddos are sick.
I do not have to accept unacceptable behavior. I do not have to tolerate violence or abuse. I always have choices. I know what was not and is not acceptable. I know what to do about it, too.
February 19, 2013
We loved coming home to find a surprise waiting for us on our front porch. The girls were super excited about it, too. These cookies were super yummy. They were so yummy we devoured them in less than 48 hours. Thank You, Ruwe Family!
All growth requires change and all change is a matter of adjustment. Perhaps we need to move forward or backward, lighten up or tighten up, let go of something old and reach out for something new. Perhaps we need to reconsider a negative attitude or be willing to do something we've never done before.
February 18, 2013
February 16, 2013
This episode does not mention Sociopathy; however, it does zoom in on lies, liars, and lie catchers. I think you will LOVE it. It's very educational and mind-boggling. They make it very interesting to listen to. In face, you might be on the edge of your seat when you hear the different scenarios.
I had such a positive experience with this particular program that I decided to subscribe to the Radiolab podcast. Now whenever my iPod syncs I will get the latest programming and can listen while I'm cleaning house or exercising on my treadmill.
If you decide to listen to DECEPTION please leave a comment!
February 15, 2013
The world is beginning to reveal its beauty which for a long time was obscured by my worrying over my troubles. I am learning to deal with them now, and what makes it easier is that I deal only with the problems that are mine. I am learning I cannot carry another's burdens, no matter how much I love them.
Here are just a few snippets from today's devotional. These particular sentences stood out to me in a huge way. I never really looked at the state of confusion in this way. Afterward, I will share a quote that ties it all together.
"Confusion can be a gift from God."
"When I am feeling confused, I try to consider it grace. It may not be time for me to act."
"If a clear solution to a problem hasn't shown itself yet, I can trust that it will appear when the time is right."
Everything has its wonders, even darkness and silence, and I learn, whatever state I may be in, therein to be content. ~Helen Keller
February 14, 2013
February 13, 2013
February 12, 2013
1. Obama is a LIAR. That's pretty much the gist of the State of the Union. If you didn't watch it tonight then you didn't miss much. I live blogged it over on my political blog. You might have to hit your refresh button to get all the updates.
2. For lent I am giving up social networking. I mentioned that I would and I have. I have removed all of my computer bookmarks and did an application uninstall for all of it on my mobile phone.
3. When I say I'm giving up social networking that means I won't be participating in or looking at Facebook, Google+, Twitter, My Fitness Pal or Pinterest. Will I survive?
4. Denying myself is a big deal when it comes to social networking. I spend A LOT of time on it. I probably spend more time than I should on it. I can't help myself. I am a social being. I love being social and I love networking. Wish me luck, okay?
5. I went through all of the upcoming birthdays on Facebook and wrote people privately to wish them a happy birthday early because I knew I wouldn't be around to do it myself on the day of. Do you think that's over-the-top?
6. I haven't missed a single day in my daily bible reading. I am already in the book of Numbers. Boy am I glad Jesus redeemed me because if I had to follow all those rules in the Old Testament Law I would have been dead by now.
7. The theology class I'm taking on Bible Doctrine is fascinating. I LOVE it! I've been to two classes and hope to complete all of them. I'd like to try for the class certificate. I have 3 chapters to read this week for homework and I haven't started reading them yet. I will get started tomorrow after I take the kiddos to school.
8. I'm really enjoying our study in the book of Hebrews. I am learning so much this semester. Our teacher is phenomenal. Hebrews is not an easy book to follow and she has this way of breaking it down. By the grace of God my faith is growing by leaps and bounds this semester. I Love Women's Bible study at my church.
9. Our washing machine broke down this week. We do not want to pay to replace the motor again. We are going to buy a new washer on Thursday. I can tell you it will not be a front loader. I might tell you why but that will be for another post. I can tell you it will have the biggest drum we can find. In the meantime our laundry is piling up. Hopefully we won't run out of clean towels before we get our new appliance.
10. I'm glad I didn't give up chocolate for lent. Last year I gave up sweets, fast food, nuts (figurative & literal), and did my best to eat clean. I didn't exercise and still managed to lose 10 lbs. This year in addition to giving up social networking I'd like to plan to work on my fitness daily and see if I can make that butterfly move on the chart at the top of this blog. I'd like to lose 10 lbs during lent again this year. Will I do it?
February 11, 2013
February 10, 2013
In many ways, human beings are perverse creatures. Some good behaviors~like apologizing~may give us bad feelings. Likewise some very bad behaviors~like telling someone off~may make us feel very good indeed. That's why we can't allow our feelings to dictate our behavior.
Of course it's important to identify our feelings. Feelings tell us a great many things. A big part of emotional health is coming to understand and respect how we feel. But too often feelings are blind guides to what is right or wrong.
Because feelings are habits, they wind around old behaviors like iron filings around a magnet. Anything we do often enough we will come to feel comfortable doing. The worrier is comfortable worrying; the workaholic, working: and the liar, lying. But no matter how comfortable we feel, it doesn't necessarily follow that these behaviors will lead to a full spiritual life based on positive self-esteem. It's important to know how we feel. But it's even more important to know that our feelings have memory but no conscience.
As I practice healthy behaviors, my feelings will follow along.
H/T: Believing In Myself
February 9, 2013
Answering the following questions will give us a quick "attitude check."
1. Do I see life as challenging and interesting, or do I see it as a painful struggle that must be endured?
2. Do I actively take steps to promote my own wellbeing, or do I passively wait for someone else to solve my problems?
3. Am I truly open to new ideas, or do I refuse to let go of old, familiar ways of thinking?
4. Do I make my own decisions, or do I allow other people to direct the course of my life?
5. Do I live comfortably in the present, or do I fear the future and bemoan the past?
6. Do I accept the imperfections of myself and others, or am I often upset and irritated by human imperfection?
February 8, 2013
I pray to be led into a new way of thinking about the difficulties I have to face. A new point of view will put them into perspective and reduce them to a manageable size. I pray especially to resist exaggerating my troubles until they overwhelm me.
It is unrealistic to expect everyone to like me. With such an expectation, I set myself up to fail and give myself an excuse to blame that failure on others. I can't change other people, but I can change my own attitudes. I can let go of my rules about how others should feel about me. When I am disappointed in another's response, I can make an extra effort to be kind, warm, and loving to myself. I am loveable just the way I am.
February 7, 2013
February 6, 2013
February 5, 2013
Let me learn to understand myself first; that will occupy me so fully that I will have no time nor thought to analyze and criticize the compulsive impossible people.
It is just as self-deceptive to discount what is good in us as to justify what is not. This is false humility, which is as hampering as arrogance! The purpose of examining our characters~with as much honesty and detachment as possible~is not to exaggerate guilt for what we lack, but to use the good to overcome the faults.
February 4, 2013
Don is back to work today. I don't know if I should applaud him or chastise him. He is a strong, determined, loyal, but stubborn man. Sometimes you just have to kick back and stay out of it. At least by this point he is on OTC pain regiment during the day and one prescription pain pill at night. I don't know how he does it.
Poor Kinsley is home from school today. Last night she had one shower, two baths, and lots of puke coming out of both ends. It was so bad I had to trash her underwear and PJ pants. Lets face it, there are some things we are not required to clean. There is a mountain of laundering to do and I have broken out the bleach. Today she is feeling a little better and so far there has been no puke from either end.
Today I am keeping my tasks reasonable. I need to get to the grocery store and will save that for when I pick Fiona up from school. I have more high fiber items to buy for Don and some tummy soothing items for Kinsley. So far Fiona and I are fine and I'd like it to stay that way.
I have been washing my hands so much my knuckles are bleeding. I've got to do something about that. My treadmill has been calling out to me. My numbers are going in the wrong direction. I have tons of reading to do. I am good! I will see this as a challenge and tackle each item one at a time. That includes disinfecting and scrubbing all of my bathrooms, too.
Does anyone have a cleaning formula that will cut through the grime on our shower floor in the master bath?
How often we think that the trials we have to face were caused by outside forces, by fate, or by God. We're only too ready to look outside ourselves for the reasons for our afflictions, when the real enemy is self-deception. We may be poor, deprived of the necessities of life, frustrated in the things we think we want to do. It is only too easy to blame all these things on other people. Yet however difficult they may make our lives, we could do a great deal to offset this damage by turning our examination and criticism on ourselves, and taking energetic steps to correct what we think and do.
February 3, 2013
This book along with the class I'm taking ought to keep me busy for the next 8 weeks. This is what got me up at 5:45 am. I may have to work on keeping this schedule. Yes, I'm still participating in Women's bible study, too!
I'm not sure how this post will turn out because I am publishing from my phone. This will be the first time I have shared a photo on this blog from my phone, too.
February 2, 2013
Yep, there's an app for that and it's pretty convenient. I've been so busy these last few days that I haven't even had time to turn on my laptop.
The girls spent the night at Grandma and Grandpa's house last night. They LOVED it. Fiona was so excited when she found out Thursday night that she woke up bright and early at 7:00 am Friday morning before school.
Wednesday we had a snow day. The girls were such good girls all day. I had not anticipated they would not be in school. I had them pack up their backpacks with their DS games, books, and writing tablets. Off to the hospital we went because their Daddy had to have surgery.
We waited, waited, and waited some more in the waiting room. Then around lunch time I took the girls to eat in the hospital cafeteria. They thought it was pretty cool to get to eat lunch with all the doctors, nurses, and administrative personnel.
Poor Don. We finally got him home around 3:30 pm. He was in a lot of pain. Thankfully they sent us home with plenty of pain pills. Today is day #3 not including Wednesday and he is still in a lot of pain. But, I will say that his appetite is improving so I think he is getting better day by day.
Don is a very private person so I won't mention what his surgery was for or provide specifics because he'd rather I don't. So I won't. But, please pray for him because he is in quite a bit of pain. They say it will take 4 to 6 weeks for him to completely heal. It's a good thing he works from home!!
Blogging from this phone app is actually not all that bad. It might make it easier for me to blog on the go or during those times I really don't feel like turning my computer on.
Well, that's all for now. Until next time...I always have quotes to share so check back soon!?? Does anyone even read my blog any more!??