The most loving form of detachment I have found has been forgiveness. Instead of thinking of it as an eraser to wipe another's slate clean or a gavel that I pound to pronounce someone "not guilty," I think of forgiveness as a scissors. I use it to cut the strings of resentment that bind me to a problem or a past hurt. By releasing resentment, I set myself free.
When I am consumed with negativity over another person's behavior, I have lost my focus. I needn't tolerate what I consider unacceptable, but wallowing in negativity will not alter the situation. If there is action to take, I am free to take it. Where I am powerless to change the situation, I will turn it over to God. By truly letting go, I detach and forgive.
When my thoughts are full of bitterness, fear, self-pity, and dreams of revenge, there is little room for love or for the quiet voice of guidance within me. I am willing to love myself enough to admit that resentments hold me back, and then I can let them go.
Every time I try to tighten the noose of resentment around someone's neck, I am really only choking myself. Today I will practice forgiveness instead.
"A part of me wants to cling to old resentments, but I know that the more I forgive, the better my life works."
H/T: Courage to Change