October 3, 2012

The conniving self-absorbed parent

The conniving self-absorbed parent is always positioning herself to win, come out on top, be superior to others, and make sure that all others understand just how they are inferior. This applies to almost all aspects of life, including her children. This parent will lie, cheat, distort, and mislead in order to achieve her goals. Others are considered fair game for manipulation and exploit them. Some effects on these parents' children as adults are a wariness and constant questioning of others' motives or a tendency to get into relationships where they are manipulated to do things they do not want to do or that aren't in their best interests.

Behaviors and Attitudes

  • Manipulative
  • Has to win at all costs
  • Lies, cheats, misleads, and distorts
  • Coercive, seductive 
  • Ingratiating to get what is wanted
  • Takes advantage of others 
  • Is dismissive of others as inferior
  • Vengeful 
  • Assumes that others are supposed to do what she wants them to do
  • Always looks for the main chance, an edge, and the like


H/T: Children of the Self-Absorbed by Nina Brown, Ed.D., LPC

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