October 3, 2012

Effects of Types on the Child: Needy

The Needy Self-Absorbed Parent

  • Compliant response: The compliant child who has a needy narcissistic parent can become overly sensitive to others' needs. she constantly monitors others for signs of distress, unmet needs, and the like. The child tried to read other people's minds, attempting to know how to behave even before a request is made. She is very anxious and fearful of disagreements and other forms of conflict. she subordinates personal needs most of the time, feels guilt and shame when others are disappointed, and does things that she doesn't want to do in trying to please others. Children of the needy parent can be easily seduced and often become enmeshed in others' feelings.
  • Rebellious response: When the child response rebelliously, the behavior of the needy narcissistic parent results in the child keeping others at a distance and often refusing to connect or engage. These children can be insensitive or can ignore others' needs. They tend to openly disagree with others but then withdraw from conflict. They are resentful when others try to seduce or coerce them. 

H/T: Children of the Self-Absorbed by Nina Brown, Ed.D., LPC

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