September 18, 2010

Judging and Shacking Up

In our home we appreciate, value, and support meaning. How Ironic that I would find THIS piece of advice TODAY from Dr. Laura! Thank you Dr. Laura for not being afraid to point out the obvious!!

Judging Others Is Not Competing with God: Tricia keeps hearing from friends that it is not right to judge other people — only God can do that. Dr. Laura clarifies the instances when God is the judge and when we are — or should be.

I would have posted the video itself but there were only very LARGE options to choose from that would not fit on my blog page too well. So I posted the URL to the video itself.

This video reminds me of two things: 1) People who believe in Jesus telling other people who believe in Jesus that they are not part of God’s family OR that they are going to hell because they have not been baptized. 2) Teenagers who think it’s okay to shack up with their boyfriend/girlfriend diminishing the importance of love and commitment within the parameters of marriage.

I know two very different topics but I can’t help myself. These two topics have been on my mind A LOT lately. As a believer in Jesus and his shed blood on the cross I am certain that his death was not in vain. His blood was enough!! There is nothing that we can do to work our way to heaven. In the bible it says that if you confess that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead YOU WILL BE SAVED. (Romans 10:9) It doesn’t say that you must be baptized in order to be saved. There is nothing that we can do to save ourselves.

I actually had someone tell me that you can’t have forgiveness of sins OR the Holy Spirit if you are not baptized. Uh excuse me? But that’s not what my Father in Heaven has told me. Last time I checked, I can pray and have a relationship with Jesus. God wants to communicate with me and because of Jesus he has given us this beautiful gift. It’s because of his good grace that we are saved because we have confessed and believed. The Holy Spirit is with us and you don’t have to be dunked, period!

Communion and Baptism.. these are all great things that come AFTER you have established your faith and believed in Jesus. People that say you can’t get into heaven if you are not baptized have taken Christ’s death on the cross and have diminished his shed blood. To top it all off these believers are telling other believers that they are going to hell. Uh… last time I checked I was pretty darn fearful of even inserting myself into the equation as God! How dare any believer tell a fellow believer that their Salvation is in question if they haven’t been baptized!! I would not want to face God on judgment day and have to answer for THAT one.

The other part of this YouTube video that has affected me so so much is the tid bit about the 18 year old teenager who decided to shack up with her boyfriend. You guys have NO idea how close to home this hits me!! I know, I know.. you’re probably thinking “I can’t believe you’re going to blog this.” Well you know what? I’m tired of being afraid to share what is going on in my life. I’m tired of thinking about the potential backlash that could result from me blogging something very real going on in our family.

My teenager was invited by her boyfriend’s mother to live with her son in her basement!! Yep, you read it and I blogged it!! I’m not happy about it. This isn’t how we raised our daughter. And living with her boyfriend in her boyfriend’s mother’s basement is not what I envisioned for her when I was raising her. She deserves so much better than THAT and I have no respect for her boyfriend’s parents whatsoever!! None — Zip — Zero — Zilch!!

June 2010


  1. Oh, Angela. I'm sorry to hear this. I will keep you and yours in my prayers. I understand completely the frustration you must be feeling over this. And I couldn't agree more. How is it that some parents do not show any support whatsoever for their kids. Granting kids permission to do things that just shouldn't be acceptable is NOT support. It's tough being a parent. You have to be ready to be hated for your decisions (at least at the moment) because if not, they will hate you in the long run. I wonder if parents like that feel that they are being the "cool" parent or if they are just striving to be really good friends with their kids. Which is a huge mistake because they have enough friends, they definitely need parenting. (I'm not sure, but I encounter this kind of thing all the time since I work with high schoolers). You would be surprised by the things I hear. Parents who have parties for their kids and their friends, buying alcohol for them, smoking weed with them, allowing boys and girls to sleep over. Crazy stuff. How can this ever be good for the next generation?

    What is the final decision? Is she eighteen? Do you have a say or can you only give her your opinion? Good luck!

  2. You’re right Tina. It’s crazy stuff and it’s not good for the next generation. These so-called “parents” are doing all of this with their kids at all ages. I know “parents” who have given up on their kids to the point of letting them do whatever they want to because they feel that their time of raising them is over. We are talking about kids who are just entering high school. They throw their hands up and pretend there is nothing they can do for them. They just sort of let them come and go as they please because it’s the easy way out. Parenting is not supposed to be taking the easy way out.

    My daughter will be 19 in October. She doesn’t live in the state of Nebraska any more so she is basically on her own. Since the law follows her now we are out of it. Thankfully, there are many states in between her and her ex-boyfriend and hopefully it will stay that way. She was fully aware that we would never support her shacking up with any boyfriend and certainly not in their parent’s basement. Right now she is living with her biological father and getting to know him, which is a good thing since he chose not to be involved in helping to raise her when she was growing up.

  3. She is no longer living with her bio dad. She went from living with him in GA to living with my folks in TX. Then she did some questionable things and wound up getting kicked out of their house. Now she lives with the ex-boyfriend’s mom. From what I understand the ex-boyfriend joined the army and his parents are completely blind, as are my parents, to what is really going on with her. Here we sit getting on with our lives. She’ll be 20 in October and hopefully she’ll figure it out because she doesn’t have too many more bridges that she can burn at this point.

  4. Speaking of parents who have parties for their kids and provide alcohol and play beer pong with them…I don’t think it’s cool at all. First of all…these kids are not 21 years of age. It’s against the law. I wish parents would actually “parent” their kids instead of trying to be their BFF’s.


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